Friday, June 6, 2008

Cool

Big doings at my house yesterday. First, I installed ceiling fans. Yeah!!!!! They are so fabulous. And in two ways. Obviously, they make my place incredibly comfortable. My place is small, and I put fans in every big room but the kitchen, so the air just really flows around. Sweet. I can put the air to a much higher temperature and still be really comfortable. You can't underestimate the value of that going into what looks like it's going to be a very hot summer.

Second, the fans replaced some ugly ass light fixtures. The bedrooms had those generic, square, glass, nothing lights. You know the ones that are flush but have open edges so the dead moths just kind of accumulate in there? Uck. And the dining room/laundry room/exercise room had the most heinous chandelier ever manufactured. Every time I'd walk by it, I'd be filled with uncontrollable feelings of hatred and loathing at its unequivocal ugliness. The worst part was that it had these free-hanging glass panels. Every time I'd make the transition from dining room to laundry room, I'd rollout my laundry cart, and smack the damn chandelier. Acommpanied by out of control clanging as the glass panels would clank against each other. I know I do dumb things. I don't need sound effects to punctuate it every time. But the fan looks terrific. Lots of lovely air when I'm exercising or laundrying. And very pretty light for dining. I'm so bloody clever.

I also had the dishwasher replaced. It was the original machine. Over 20 years old. Here's the thing. Dishwashers have become so efficient, that we don't remember how much they actually sucked 20 years ago. The weren't really dishwashers, per se. They were more like an autoclave for your plates and utensils. You had to wash the all food off your dishes before you put them in the "dishwasher". They were really dish rinsers, rather than actual dish washers. But they have come a long way since then. Only mine was 20 years old. And had become even less effective in those 20 years. The last time I used it, it didn't even clean off the coffee that had dripped on the door. It was basically a giant drain rack for the dishes I had hand washed. And it was basically driving me crazy. I can't stand machines that don't do what they should. It's like having a lazy servant. And I will not have that. So the dishwasher had to go.

Texas had a tax-free weekend for Energy Star appliances over Memorial Day weekend. Sweet, right? So I picked up a reasonably priced machine, and paid for installation. But, if you were with me through my move-in you'll remember, my kitchen was such a greaseball when I first moved in, I figured that I should pull out the old machine the night before, and just to a little cleaning before they came for the install. I knew there were 2 screws that I had to undo to get the machine out, so I whipped those out. Put my fingers around the sides. And pulled the entire front door off. I'm pretty sure a person can't look dumber than the dumb/shocked look you get standing there with the door of the dishwasher in your hands. Which got me to the "oh, screw it" point. I just leaned the door against the machine, and waited for the helpful Sears delivery lady to come cart the piece of crap away. Lazy, no-good servant! You are dismissed. And don't expect a reference!!

5 comments:

Desiree' said...

Yay! Ceiling fans! I love mine. They have been doing quite the workout lately since I have not yet turned on the ac for the summer. Yeah, its really hot, but I am only there for the really muggy evenings. The rest of the day, I am sitting in the ice cold box I call my office. And the kids have been at grandma's all week. Unfortunately, my bro, sis-in-law, and the babester are staying with us again, so they are sweating all day. I just can't afford the ac! Also, I was hoping that they would get off their lazy asses and go get jobs, so they can move out that much sooner. But, alas, I can delay no longer. I am turning that old ac on when I get home from work. I don't want to sweat all weekend. But I hope everyone can deal with the temp being on 85. That's as low as I can get and still afford the bill. Maybe if some "house guests" were contributing...

FirePhrase said...

Hmmm. I'd go home and secretly put Saran wrap behind the vents in rooms occupied by anyone not chipping in. "The AC isn't working in your room? Huh. Weird."

85 seems to be doable with fans. In fact, 80 seems a little chilly when the air is moving. And after working in the ice box all day, slightly warm seems kind of pleasant. Which your houseguests would know if . . . well, here's hoping they'll find the joys of climate controlled employment real soon.

WashingtonGardener said...

Brilliant idea! "You know where the AC works just fine?" At most offices and stores - maybe you should applly for a JOB at one of those places."

victory4angela said...

Ugh I can barely stand 75 (at home) with fans. Maybe it's my post-chemo body where I break out in hives if I get too hot, but I don't like being warm and 85 is not fun. Last week when it was a bajillion degrees here, I went to dinner in an air-conditioned restaurant and I was sweating like crazy.

However, I like the saran wrap approach to get the slackers out of the house. Kathy's write, there are places with AC and it's called a JOB.

FirePhrase said...

85 is slightly pushing it for me. I'm really fond of about 81. But right now, 81 would just about wear my wallet out. I just have to do what my Mom would always tell me when I was a kid and she wouldn't turn the air on - think cool thoughts. Or eat popsicles.

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