Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Don't go fishing in Vancouver

http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/17/canada.feet/index.html
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080617/ap_on_re_ca/canada_mystery_feet;_ylt=AvkwQnvt4QD1KXV6SQ4Fbi4Qr7sF

I'm just kind of amazed at how lack-a-daisical the cops seem to be about this. 5 feet (four rights, 1 left) in 10 months. In the 2 accounts I've read, they don't even mention having gone back up the river to find out, maybe, where the feet are coming from. In fact, the AP account on Yahoo says that the foot might not even have been severed and thrown into the river. It may just have popped off. Of a body that was already in the river. Hello? The fact that there are multiple sources of the body parts bobbing along your river only seems to be a point of speculation. Evidently it's not strange enough to make somebody pick up a phone and call another police department upstream and say "Hey, anybody up there missing a foot?"

And the cop who says "Hey, hey, hey, what do you think we are CSI:Saskatoon?". Um. No, my little Canuck Barney Fife, I don't expect you to have some magic equipment that would tell you who the foot belongs to. But I do kind of expect that after nearly a year, you express some sort of curiosity about where the feet are coming from. One foot in the river? That's a little weird. Possibly a fluke. A really creepy fluke, but still. Five feet in the river? That's a trend, my friend. Possibly it was just a tragic freak wading accident involving a long pier and an out of control boat propeller. Or. Perhaps, just perhaps, it's time to call in the Mounties.

2 comments:

momo said...

Unbelievable, at the least there must have been five missing persons reports in the last 10 months somewhere upstream from this location?! Obviously there is more to the story ...

FirePhrase said...

I guess technically, it might be only 4 missing people, since that left foot might belong with one of the rights. (That is just so gross.)

Unless there's just a rash of bizzare axe throwing/log rolling mishaps at lumberjack contests in northern Canada which have resulted in chopped off feet accidentally falling in the river. Sing it with me now! "I chop off my foot/and throw it in the river!/Oh, I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay/I sleep all night and I work all day . . ."

TIME: Quotes of the Day