Friday, September 12, 2008

A Sorbo is a terrible thing to waste

Okay, so last night I'm watching the last half of a Lifetime movie I had recorded. And it was an egregiously Lifetime movie. Bolier plate woman in jeop from evil ex, handsome man to the rescue, cute kid on the side, bad dialogue, stock characters, and a threatening bobcat thrown in for good measure (and for the record, I don't know anyone who actually lives in bobcat territory who lives in terror of an attack; sure they have a healthy respect for a wild animal, but nobody actually scurries around in wide-eyed terror). So why watch this piece of teeerash? Simple. Kevin Sorbo.

I gots a little thing for Kevin Sorbo. He's so not my type. But he's just so dang cute. He's handsome, he's fit, he's charming, he's Hercules. And he always makes me giggle girlishly when he shows up. And frankly, I don't think he shows up enough. Can someone not find a project for this man? [Though he did show up in a classic guest spot on the best show of the year (The Middleman - watch it, people!) I think it shows a sad lack of imagination that Hollywood can't come up with a use for the world's most under-used natural resource - Kevin Sorbo. (Blogger's note - I'm shaking my fist to emphasize this point.)

Though I guess he's still got Hercules money and probably only has to work when he wants to. Though why he'd choose this Lifetime weepy of the week to squander his inimitable talent, I can't figure. Maybe he needs to build a new deck on his house. Or he was just sitting around in his boxers, bored out of his mind (allow me to take a moment to visualize that . . . .), and decided to just take the first thing that came along. Anyway, I felt bad for him. Not only was this the bottom of the barrel sort of Lifetime dreck, it was written by Linda Lael Miller. And while Ms. Miller can write the bejeesus out of a sex scene in a book (some naughty stuff), she can't write dialogue to save a whale. It's almost George Lucas-dialogue bad. Ouch. I found myself wincing, some of those clunkers were so bad. Ah, Kevin Sorbo. You poor thing.

Hollywood, don't let this happen again. Sorbo. Use him. (Fist shaking!)

1 comment:

WashingtonGardener said...

I never watched Hercules with Sorbo - but I can see the appeal.

BTW DO watch True Blood - YOU will ove it - all the folks in this small Louisiana town are smokin' hot and of course, horny as hell - then the vamps go public - yes. A great sense of humor about itself - Buffy-esqe but almost a little more like Picket Fences feel to me. Anyway WELL worth an hour and am mightily looking fwd to the next ep.

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