Somebody bring me some water

Here’s where I’m at with global warming. And it’s probably just because it’s crazy-hot here that I’m thinking about it more lately. Kind of like when you find there’s only a teaspoon of milk in the carton and think “I should by milk.” And the overwhelming sense of impending doom that I feel any time I’ve read or watched too much news is a contributing factor. Anyway. Here’s where I’m at: I don’t actually know if humans are contributing to global warming. I don’t know if this is a mini-trend or a sign of the coming apocalypse. Maybe the creep up in the temperatures is going to creep right on back down again. I don’t know. I do know that it could be the beginning of something really bad, regardless of the cause. And by now, we should probably have a frigging plan.

I don’t even go on vacation with out a plan. I don’t go to the grocery store without a plan. But evidently, there’s no plan about what we’re going to do if the entire northern hemisphere turns into an EZ Bake Oven.

And again, it may be because I live in Texas and it’s hotter than a $2 pistol out there that I’m thinking about this. And, evidently, we don’t have a plan. Cattle dropping dead in the fields. Cantaloupes the size of apricots. Towns turning off city water. Small children drying up and blowing away. Okay, not children. But definitely Chihuahuas. They dry up and their little ears catch a breeze – and whoosh! They’re gone like a paper airplane. And can I point out that Texas is not, in fact, land locked? There’s a gulf, like, right there. But do we have a plan on how to make that water usable and get it to the cows and the cantaloupes and the Chihuahuas? Nope. And can I point out that we can move oil around this place like a motherfucker, but water has to kind of stay where it’s at? The Hohokam Indians built canals in Phoenix 1,500 years ago (look it up) using stone shovels and sticks to irrigate a DESERT. No backhoes. No desalination plants. No government permits. But I guess maybe they had a PLAN.