So, Angelina Jolie says she doesn’t have many friends. Frankly, I’m not surprised. Not that I have any reason to doubt that she’s a worthy human being. She seems to be pretty alright gal. But, indisputably, she’s gorgeous. And let’s face it, most women have trouble being friends with really gorgeous women. It’s one of the less lovable things about us. If to men the words “she’s got a really great personality” are code for “she’s about as attractive as a bowl of vanilla pudding,” then to women, it should probably mean “she’s really gorgeous, but don’t hold that against her.” It’s atavistic. It’s lizard brain territory. It’s basic instinct. Gorgeous women are out to steal your man. Even if she isn’t. Even if she wouldn’t ever. Even if you don’t have a man to steal. We’ll have friends who are smarter, funnier, richer, more creative. But prettier? That’s a toughy.
One time I went to the beach with a friend, who I knew was pretty – tall, platinum blond, jaw line that will never age. But when she came out of the bathroom in a hot pink bikini, my very first thought was “I’m a really, really good person for being friends with you.” I wouldn’t say I was jealous. I’d just say that, even without her making an effort, I look like a sack of potatoes next to her. It’s kind of demoralizing. I don’t discriminate against friends who are better looking than me. It’s just harder to like a person who is way, way better looking. Not a nice thing to say, but I think true. My friend throws a lot of shade. And she’s totally, totally worth getting to know in spite of that blindingly obvious fact. I'm so very glad I got beyond it. Unfortunately, lots of people miss out. Maybe she’s not hated because she’s beautiful. But she’s also not befriended much either.
It’s kind of like the matching theory. Where psychologists say that we tend to fall in love with people who are pretty much the same level of attractiveness that we ourselves are. We also tend to flock with birds of similar feathers. And not many people have as good looking feathers as Angelina Jolie. I almost feel sorry for her. But I’m not quite that good of a person.
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2 comments:
I'd say the BIG part of her having friends problem is being rich, famous and the progeny of rich, famous parents -- she can NEVER trust anyone that they like her for HER. Unlike those who make it later in life and can still trust their childhood friends who knew them "before" - she never had a before period. Does suck for her and explains the kid collecting.
There's no doubt that her dad has been an albatross in more ways than one - she, Lindsay Lohan and Ireland Baldwin could start a support group. But there are other rich kids with famous parents who seem to be able to manage to have friends. And she's not friends with any of them either. Though you're right about the kid collecting. And since the Pitt is baby daddy, that's almost as close to a guarantee of pretty kids as you get in the mortal coil.
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