Okay, I love ushering. It’s community service, and I get to see a free show. Win-win. But there are 2 things that are starting to bug me. One comes from a complete lack of manners. And the other is from, shall we say, an overabundance of them.
The first is really many things lumped together under “I was raised in a barn” behavior. By the time your are an adult, you should know how to behave at a theater. No chitty-chatty. No putting your feet on the back of the person-in-front-of-you’s seat. Applaud when moved, or, barring that, when polite. And even by the time you are a teenager, if you aren’t up on all the niceties, you should be able to observe other people and do what they do. But when the adults have been raised in a barn, what are the kiddos to do? Okay, I admit some things are new or changing about manners. No one had to be told not to text or snap pictures during a performance in 1910, obviously. But word has gotten around. And some things have absolutely not changed. It was impolite to rush out to get to your car when Lionel Barrymore was on the stage. And it’s impolite now.
The other thing is seat switchers. Not that I personally have anything against the practice. I may or may not have given myself an upgrade in a sparsely attended performance. But here’s the thing – do not ask me, the usher, if it’s okay. I’m representing the house. Under most circumstances, I am obligated to tell you “no”. Regardless of how I may or may not feel about you moving to a better seat. But I’m very busy doing my job. I cannot be everywhere at once. I don’t remember where you were sitting. And as a rule, most ushers are very nice people. Even if we should notice that you are not now where you once were, we are highly unlikely to say anything about it. And if you were to do this without me noticing, and had done discreet reconnaissance work prior, you would not end up in a seat that someone was previously sitting in. If you were to do this. Without me noticing. And asking me if you can forces me to notice. Which I may or may not have done otherwise.
Are these little things enough to make me not want to usher any more? Hell no! Did I mention it’s a free show?
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2 comments:
LOL - seat upgrading is for us pros , amateurs (the askers amd others) should NOT attempt it.
BTW texting bad - phone talking worse - phone ringing and scrambling to find it in your cavernous bag is the WORST. I think everyone around you + all those onstage shold be able to give yo a swift kick to the rear as you exit for that.
People were drinking A LOT more than usual at Ave Q. I mean talking back to the stage drunk. Funny. But not really conducive to taking in the show.
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