Cool

Big doings at my house yesterday. First, I installed ceiling fans. Yeah!!!!! They are so fabulous. And in two ways. Obviously, they make my place incredibly comfortable. My place is small, and I put fans in every big room but the kitchen, so the air just really flows around. Sweet. I can put the air to a much higher temperature and still be really comfortable. You can't underestimate the value of that going into what looks like it's going to be a very hot summer.

Second, the fans replaced some ugly ass light fixtures. The bedrooms had those generic, square, glass, nothing lights. You know the ones that are flush but have open edges so the dead moths just kind of accumulate in there? Uck. And the dining room/laundry room/exercise room had the most heinous chandelier ever manufactured. Every time I'd walk by it, I'd be filled with uncontrollable feelings of hatred and loathing at its unequivocal ugliness. The worst part was that it had these free-hanging glass panels. Every time I'd make the transition from dining room to laundry room, I'd rollout my laundry cart, and smack the damn chandelier. Acommpanied by out of control clanging as the glass panels would clank against each other. I know I do dumb things. I don't need sound effects to punctuate it every time. But the fan looks terrific. Lots of lovely air when I'm exercising or laundrying. And very pretty light for dining. I'm so bloody clever.

I also had the dishwasher replaced. It was the original machine. Over 20 years old. Here's the thing. Dishwashers have become so efficient, that we don't remember how much they actually sucked 20 years ago. The weren't really dishwashers, per se. They were more like an autoclave for your plates and utensils. You had to wash the all food off your dishes before you put them in the "dishwasher". They were really dish rinsers, rather than actual dish washers. But they have come a long way since then. Only mine was 20 years old. And had become even less effective in those 20 years. The last time I used it, it didn't even clean off the coffee that had dripped on the door. It was basically a giant drain rack for the dishes I had hand washed. And it was basically driving me crazy. I can't stand machines that don't do what they should. It's like having a lazy servant. And I will not have that. So the dishwasher had to go.

Texas had a tax-free weekend for Energy Star appliances over Memorial Day weekend. Sweet, right? So I picked up a reasonably priced machine, and paid for installation. But, if you were with me through my move-in you'll remember, my kitchen was such a greaseball when I first moved in, I figured that I should pull out the old machine the night before, and just to a little cleaning before they came for the install. I knew there were 2 screws that I had to undo to get the machine out, so I whipped those out. Put my fingers around the sides. And pulled the entire front door off. I'm pretty sure a person can't look dumber than the dumb/shocked look you get standing there with the door of the dishwasher in your hands. Which got me to the "oh, screw it" point. I just leaned the door against the machine, and waited for the helpful Sears delivery lady to come cart the piece of crap away. Lazy, no-good servant! You are dismissed. And don't expect a reference!!